Like being at a 4-way-stop sign and both myself and the other driver trying to wave the other one to go first—and then both of us chuckling at ourselves for wanting the other to go. Then we connected through a smile for just a second as they drove off.
Or being at the grocery store, where Flo has worked for decades, and I’ve never gone through her line before, listening to her stories of all the children she’s seen grow up through the years and watching her interact with the child in front of me.
Life is made up of these little moments. It’s these moments that make us feel alive. It is in these moments that we remember to be present, to open up ourselves and to connect.
It’s in the present that we experience such beauty. But these moments can be missed so easily when our head is lowered down towards our phone or our thoughts are barraged by the dress-rehearsal in our head. We miss these moments of aliveness, of connection, if we aren’t there—being fully present.
Which is why I love an exercise I found while reading Barbara Fredrickson’s Love 2.0 during our weekend long snowstorm.
By accident, she discovered in her studies that people saw significant improvement in their well being by simply asking themselves a reflective question at the end of their day.
Here’s this simple exercise that she claims can change your life.
First, identify three people who you spent the most time with that day. Now, think of those interactions. Combining these interactions, ask yourself how true each statement is for you. Rate each statement as – 1 being not true at all and 7 being very true.
- During these social interactions, I felt “in tune” with the person/s around me.
- During these social interactions, I felt close to the person/s.
That’s it. That’s the whole exercise. Now, can you do it for a week, 30 days or a few months? I challenge you to do it and let me know the results. I’m going to take the challenge as well.
What we have to remember and recognize here is that social connectedness is critical to our well being. I’ve talked about the dreaded epidemic of loneliness before, and this is just a reminder of how we really are wired to connect with one another.
It’s pivotal to our sense of well being and sense of aliveness that we connect with one another. And not just connect in a haphazard, senseless-kind-of-way, but in a way that truly fosters something meaningful.
How many days, weeks, months or even years have you gone without truly connecting with others?
Let’s take this challenge and, just maybe, it’ll change your life.
You can find this exercise and other tools on the authors website at http://www.positivityresonance.com